The Light within the Darkness: Hospice
It’s quiet… No one is talking or even thinking about the inevitable. A blackness of silence permeates the room, the family, the individual; stillness, only shattered by one’s thoughts waiting to be heard.
It is the news that someone in your family has been diagnosed with cancer, the BIG C we call it; and now the fear factor is working in overdrive. It’s quiet because no one knows what to say or even do at this point. Panic sets in. There are doctor’s appointments to make, medicine’s to buy, tests to take and a thousand things clouding one’s mind. All of these things happening, yet blanketed by the fear, the choked back tears, the “Why Me?” questions in a process of denial that has started to worm its way into your head. Yet there is light ahead in the form of hope.
It is called Hospice care. If recognized early enough, a condition that is life-threatening, like cancer, can be referred to hospice; which can prolong life, decrease pain and suffering for not only a patient but for their family too. Hospice involves a team approach to care and caring. Many people from different back- grounds make up this team; all with varying skill sets and from different professions: The medical director, the nurses, home health aids, chaplain and social workers. All of whom who care for the patient, as this team approach engulfs the patient and their immediate family.
I was called upon by the Chinese government to go to China in 2008 to teach hospice to medical professionals, nurses and dental personnel within a hospital setting. There is no hospice in China amidst a burgeoning older population. There is no such thing as palliative care either. Teaching people in the medical field is supposed to be like “singing to the choir;” but in a country that has a different culture, different ideals and philosophy about life and death, it is like “pulling teeth” from a chicken. Two million people die from smoking habits each year in China. The only light they see is the smoldering embers of their ashes as they drift off in peace from lung cancer.
May 14th, 2010 at 12:30 pm
I heard about your book, google brought me here. I was dx with Central Sleep Apnea as well as three other rare diseases and wasn’t given more than six months to live. My experience has been nothing short of abandonment by todays society. Technically I’ve lost the live I once had, but more so the most precious thing lost to me is “consideration” I’m simply not considered a viable option that anyone need consider what I might think, want, do, you can fill in the verb. I’ve become isolated not because I don’t like people, I love people. But I’ve become the pink elephant that sits in the middle of the room. Everyone sees it, but no one will admit it is there. They are just hoping it will go away. And soon.After I passed my “expiration date, then it was deemed that I no longer needed to “receive anyone’s consideration on how I was supposed to live, wasnt’ I grateful for being alive? ” I find myself making decisions based upon how it will reflect upon my memory and I fnd that terribly sad.I feel like the relative that has worn out their welcome when they come to visit. I haven’t attended a family gathering in years just to avoid the stares and whishpers. I haven’t figured out how to straddle that line of dying while I’m still trying to live. I was expected to die in 2005, so it has been a long process, not that I’m complaining, but then I guess this does sound like that. I find it amazing that people today don’t see how it reflects upon them when they treat an ill person poorly, but then again , they don’t worry, I’m just one person, and a sick one at that, so why bother? Once you don’t have a paying job, the government and society considers you to be a blight upon their good efforts. I too wanted to be one of those glowing inspiring people, but the world just wouldn’t let me die a good death without showing me its true colors. Peggy
May 14th, 2010 at 12:32 pm
Oh, I fogot to mention. No one has mentioned. Not one single person. The fact that I am still alive and how that is a good thing.