What did you say??? Excuse me??? Pardon me????? Sorry???? Come again?????

I am sure we have all heard these words before. Think about when you have heard these words. Probably when someone was out of earshot to you and was just out of audible reach yelling something to you. You, in turn, found yourself using one of these slogans in return. However, if you noticed that they were in the same room, or sitting next to you, one of two things has happened. You weren’t paying attention, for whatever reason, or you weren’t listening…or maybe, you just couldn’t hear what the other person was saying to you. That’s it, isn’t it??? You are losing some of your hearing capacity and are too proud to tell anyone or do anything about it. Who wants to wear a BULKY hearing aid anyway???!

Well, here’s the skinny on hearing. There is so much noise pollution today that most of us have a hearing deficit. Using cell phones in one particular ear, wearing earphones for an iPod or other music device or phone device will definitively diminish hearing over time.

Hearing aids too have changed. They are miniscule and almost invisible to the naked eye. I will even go so far as to say that in some circumstances, hearing aids are down to just a small hair-like antennae sticking out of one’s ear…so there should be no excuse, other than not having enough money, to get one. The ability to hear again with a hearing aide will increase your self-esteem and make you feel better all around. Once you realize how much you have been missing, it won’t be difficult to assuage or lessen any of the resistance one might have had in the past to own an assisted hearing device and use it.

Hearing loss affects most people after the age of 20. Age-related hearing loss, called presbycusis, is the slow loss of hearing that occurs as people get older. The following factors contribute to age-related hearing loss:

• Family history
• Repeated exposure to loud noises
• Smoking (smokers are more likely to have such hearing loss than nonsmokers)
• Certain medications and medical conditions also contribute to hearing loss.

About half of all people over 75 years of age have some amount of age-related hearing loss. Hearing loss can result in both physical (not hearing a fire alarm) and psychological (social isolation) problems. The hearing loss may lead to deafness, so as soon as one notices this problem occurring, one should see their doctor immediately for care; especially if the hearing loss is coupled with headaches, vision changes, or dizziness.

Hear more…enjoy more life!! It is also a gift you give to other people.

Being alone is sometimes a good thing, but at the same time it remains a double-edged sword. We all need our alone time, whether it is on top of a mountain, fishing, gardening, reading a good book or seeing a movie. The difficulty comes when one does not go out at all or see other people socially. Being cloistered in one’s own home or apartment and never going out can have detrimental psychological effects on the psyche and mind.

People tend to get depressed a lot quicker by choosing to be alone all the time and not seeing other human beings. I remember reading about a native tribe in the South Pacific who ostracized one of their tribesmen when that person made an infraction against the law of the land within the village. The person was told to leave the tribe and never, NEVER talk to anyone within the tribe again or have any kind of contact with them. Eventually, this person died.

It goes without saying that the human touch is a basic need. It is our most intimate form of communication and a basic desire for all humans. We all need to be wanted and feel needed.

Touch allows one to express their feelings and to receive the feelings of others. Our words are an extension of our thoughts and feelings and show others our actions towards them in a verbal way including the expression of our values and habits. Without human words and touch, people’s self-esteem is lowered and they eventually get depressed and will die of loneliness. Men are especially more vulnerable and have a higher percentage of suicide than older women due to the inability of men to form longer lasting social relationships in later life. Women are basically more gregarious and I think live longer because of this fact. Be social and live a longer and happier life!

Guilt can ruin your day, wreck your week, crumble your month and destroy your sense of self….What is it you may ask? I know most of us have felt it some time within our lifetimes, but most of us find it difficult to describe. I like to compare it to a small “knot” in the pit of my stomach that I feel when I know that either I have been provoked for something I have done or something someone else has done that just doesn’t sit right with me.

The Oxford American Desk Dictionary defines guilt as: fact of having committed a specified or implied offense. 1. Sinfulness, wrongdoing, misconduct, 2.a. Blame; responsibility; 2.b. remorse, regret, contrition, or shame. There you have it then…that little knot in your gut I spoke about. Guilt though, more commonly can be brought on by feelings of inadequacy with respect to being a care giver who does not want to let someone else take care of the patient or loved one in question. It is also brought on by the care giver feeling inadequate or “guilty” about not being there in case something were to happen to the loved one and they weren’t there to take responsibility. So in effect, it is the undoing of taking responsibility for the care of someone you charge yourself with for such duty.

Recently, I came across someone who had not had respite from taking care of her husband for over seven years!! Can you imagine the guilt she must have allowed herself to feel for even thinking that she should do something for herself…Recent research has pointed out that care givers who do not get respite from taking care of a loved one with dementia or other maladies, will have a three to four times greater probability of coming down with dementia or nervous breakdown after a time. Guilt also works wonders on lowering one’s self-esteem, allowing them to feel smaller than an ant!!

Person’s with a whole lot of guilt need to be made aware of their feelings and rationale for not allowing themselves freedom to take care of them selves from time to time. Without this freedom guilt goes into depression and depression goes into anger and continued low self-esteem. Protect yourself and allow yourself the freedom to enjoy your own life. Your loved one is not going to go away while you are out getting your hair done or shopping. They would probably want you to do this for yourself. Let it be and live!!!!