Aging Mentor Services » The Laughter Corner

On the Lighter Side: Arrested Development

blogzeidi — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 14:52:02 +0000

An elderly couple was driving across the country. While the woman was behind the wheel, the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol.

“Ma’am, did you know you were speeding?” the officer said.

The woman, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, “What did he say?”

“He said you were speeding!” the old man yelled.

The patrolman then asked, “May I see your license?”

The woman turned to her husband again, “What did he say?”

The old man yelled back, “He wants to see your license!”

The woman then gave the officer her license.

“I see you are from Arkansas,” the patrolman said. “I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I’ve ever seen.”

The woman turned to her husband again and asked, “What did he say?”

The old man replied, “He said he knows you!”

LAUGHTER IS THE BEST MEDICINE…

blogzeidi — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 21:47:25 +0000

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions. How old are you?….”I’m four and a half” ….You’re never 36 and a half….you’re four and a half going on five!
That’s the key. You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number. How old are you? “I’m gonna be 16.” You could be 12, but you’re gonna be 16.

And then the greatest day of your life happens… You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony….you BECOME 21… YES! But then you turn 30… Ooohhh what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk… He TURNED, we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now.

What’s wrong?? What changed?? You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40…stay over there, it’s all slipping away….

So you BECOME 21, you TURN 30, you’re PUSHING 40, you REACH 50, you MAKE IT to 60 …… then you build up so much speed you HIT 70!

After that, it’s a day by day thing. After that, you HIT Wednesday… You get into your 80′s, you HIT lunch. My grandmother won’t even buy green bananas … It’s an investment you know, and maybe a bad one. It doesn’t end there …. into the 90′s you start going backwards… I was JUST 92…

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again …. “I’m 100 and a half!”

The Laughter Corner…

Dr. Shapira — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 07:13:08 +0000

Feeling Crabby? How about a little humor to lighten your load?
Morris, an 82-year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm.

The doctor spoke to Morris and said, “You’re really doing great, aren’t you?”

Morris replied, “Just doing what you said, Doctor, ‘Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.’”

The doctor said, “I didn’t say that. I said you got a heart mummer and be careful.”